if this is what the future holds, gimme death…
so I went to work…and locked my keys in a closet…I think…that would be my house key and the key to the closets and other doors in the building where I work…the spare set of car keys were in the pocket of my jacket–which was locked in a closet…so I came back to G-burg (via subway and bus) got the roomie’s keys and went back to Tenleytown, got the car and came home…
the hearing is not good, the eyesight is not good, the bladder/kidneys are not good and the short-term memory is failing…I suspect it’s gonna get worse…tomorrow is another day, but right now I feel like I’m done living…I took more than 1 dose of my HBP meds–maybe because I DON’T wanna die…I thought about gettin’ drunk but I figured when I got sober I’d still be stupid…and the liquor store was closed anyway…
I’m not too concerned about “missing” a day at work–yet…But fucking up? THAT really bothers me…I’ve actually locked the keys in a closet before but there was someone there with their own set to bail me out…But because I was ALONE, there was no back-up system…and I won’t be able to go back until Monday morning when the back-up system will allegedly be in place…
ADDENDUM–now it’s the next day (Sunday) and I woke up…kinda surprising…slowly recovering from my fuck up at work…trying not to think about the possible repercussions, if any…as for now, the BP is higher than *I* think it should be, but I know it could be WAY worse…I HATE not being able to get angry–I think holding it in is just as dangerous as letting it out…