FriendBurst Blog

Elton John said it best, didn’t he? What is with that little word “sorry” that makes it so hard for people to say? Why is it so hard for some people to admit they were wrong or made a mistake and just say that simple word as a way of making restitution for it? Does anyone remember on “Happy Days” that even the Fonz couldn’t bring himself to say he was “wrrrrr…..wrrrrrr…wrrrrrr” on most occasions when he was wrong.

What is the big deal? Has any one of us ever not screwed something up or said something that might have hurt another person? No, none of us can and if you think you never have, go grab yourself a cookie cause gosh darn it you deserve one. You’ll still be wrong but at least the sugar rush might help you to enjoy your delusional state a bit more.

Now couples fight over many things which makes the “S” word a necessary thing to use at some point, such as money, raising their children, or how they guy went to the store and picked up the CRUNCHY peanut butter instead of the SMOOTH that his wife or girlfriend asked for. She’s mad because she doesn’t think he was listening to her talk and he’s mad because he was good enough to run to the store for her and save her the trip, but that good deed has become null and void because of his mistake. She thinks he’s a jerk and he thinks she’s an unappreciative b***h. Whatever! You know this type of misunderstanding happens at least once in every relationship. Both sides have their own reasons for their anger, yet both sides will absolutely refuse to see things from the other person’s point of view, at least at first. If you’re lucky, one person will start to see the light and realize “okay, there might be a little something at least to what they are saying”. This is when that little 5 letter word starting in “SOR” and ending in “RY” comes into play. But why, just WHY is it so hard for some people to say?

From my own personal experience, I have discovered that most men have a very hard time with this word. They will do just about anything they can to avoid having to say it, even if they honestly and without a reasonable doubt, messed up and even if it’s the quickest way to exit the doghouse. If you are fortunate enough to have the female in your life just out right tell you when she is mad/hurt/pissed off about something, rather than make you endure that annoying as hell female game of “Guess why I’m acting like a cold pissed off b***h towards you” appreciate this gift for what it is and take into consideration her reason for being unhappy. Maybe, just MAYBE, she might have something there and you do have something to apologize about. If this is the case and knowing that just saying you’re sorry would be the quickest and cleanest way of ending the whole thing, why do you often instead think that telling us “That meat loaf you made last night was really good” or “ Those jeans you wore two weeks ago really didn’t make your butt look big at all” is going to make up for it instead?  Yes, I have noticed that men will very often search through their mental arsenal of all the things that they have ever said to their woman at some point in their relationship that made them happy before and just decides to toss whatever they find lying around there at her, crosses their fingers, and hopes that somehow if saying that made her happy before, it might do it again this time.

{{Shaking my head}}

No guys, it DOESN’T work. Now you could also try the “good deed” approach to avoid saying the “S” word such as doing the dishes or taking out the garbage without being asked to. Now THIS will indeed help make the ice melt a bit. However, if you want a clear path back to having her not looking at you with that “I’m currently sucking on a lemon” face, accompanying these actions with the “S” word should reinstate whatever form of harmony that usually exists in your home toot sweet.

Now ladies, as much as I hate to admit this, we are wrong and at fault sometimes, too. (Yeah, I know it’s not as often as men are but don’t tell them that. Shhhhhhhh.) But once in awhile, we screw up, too, and even if they wont admit it, we can hurt our guy’s feelings sometimes, too. They will rarely if ever admit this fact to us because that would make them “soft” but trust me, it happens. But you see unlike us, men don’t usually act cold or come out and say anything to us about it when it happens. Rather if something is bothering them, they just go off by themselves to lick their wounds in their own quiet way (and how they wish we would simply do the same). This is when our female intuition has to come into play. Yes ladies, for as much as we expect men to read our minds to know what is going on with us, the truth is we need to read theirs.  I know, I know, don’t we all have enough to do already? It’s true but most men in our lives our worth the extra effort, I believe at least. I have also found that men are much more receptive to hearing “I’m sorry” and any other attempt of ours to make up for our goofs more than we are to them. Maybe it’s because guys aren’t used to a woman admitting they are wrong, or maybe because they aren’t used to having someone realize that they often have feelings as soft as ours are, but they just hide it better under their hardened, tough exteriors.

So as I end my first attempt and showing both sides of “I’m sorry” I would like to simply say this. Men, be good to your women. Women, be good to your men. In the end, we’re all just human.