My Floofie
See…now…I know it could be expected of me to drone on and on about the worms that crawl around in my brain…expound on what a monster I am (I am)…speak of blood lust…my conquests…my battles…tell you tales of my adventures through time and although all thoroughly enthralling…what I wish to speak of…is…the insanities of my world.
My toilet seat floofie has gone to hell! One little goddamn corner will not stay on! I stretch it on…it pops off…I stretch it on…it pops off…I stretch it on while I swear at it…and…it pops off! It’s driving me insane!
What is yours truly to do now? It’s not like I can take my Benzie to a store and purchase just one black…with rose embroidery…toilet seat floofie! The store will not f*cking have that! It came in a set! Jesus…stay on…stay on…stay on…*pop*…damnit.
So…now I am going to have to hunt down an appropriate package set…again! Do you have any idea the level of difficulty in finding a black…with rose embroidery…set?! Almost impossible! Even for one such as I! London doesn’t have them…Rome doesn’t have them…Istanbul doesn’t have them…goddamnit.
I am now going to be forced to purchase the toilet seat mat…not to mention the floofie itself…the sink mat and the toilet bowl tank cozy…all because of one little corner of my current black…with rose embroidery… toilet seat floofie!
Come on you bastard…*pop*.
I can sympathize darling, I too have a wayward floofie!
OMG! A response! I’m so excited I could pee my cape! Thank you Sophiabunny! Yes…wayward flofies are a bitch!