FriendBurst Blog

It’s taken me a while to think of ten things about myself that I haven’t already blogged about.  But anyway, here it goes.

1.  When I was a teenager, I got pretty good at martial arts.  I took Tae Kwon Do classes for a year and a half and was subscribed to Inside Kung Fu magazine for four years.  I used to finish all my homework at school so I could practice more when I got home.  For over four years, I practiced at least three hours each day.  I trained so hard, by the time I finally got into classes, my teacher fast-tracked me from white belt up to brown belt within two months.  I never got a chance to test for black belt because funds ran short and I had to drop out of classes.  I didn’t really care about belt rank though, because from what I saw, it encourage people outside of class to start fights with the students to prove their toughness.  I publicly claimed yellow belt to keep that type of crap to a minimum.

2.  I have pet spiders in my house.  Almost every window sill in my house has a spider living in it.  I’ve got one in my bathroom window that is almost three years old.  Here’s a picture and some information on the Southern House Spiders that I keep in my house.  The main reason why I keep spiders around is they eat these guys.

3.  I get along great with snakes and spiders and other creepy-crawlies.  The only type of bugs I can’t stand is roaches.  Especially the giant ones.  For some reason those things piss me off so bad.  I’ve spent almost ten years trying to get over my aversion to these things.  Until I can bring myself to feel relaxed compassion for them, I’ll see myself as lacking in the Buddist/shamanism department.

4.  As far as religion goes, I’m a panthiest, Buddhist, agnostic, shamanism enthusiast with Christian, Pagan, and Atheist tendencies.  Yeah, it doesn’t make much sense to me either, but it feels right.

5.  I am an unnaturally militant nonconformist to a fault.  I boycotted the entire decade of the 80’s.  I spent half the decade dressing like a nerd from the 50’s.  I spent the other half growing my hair out and basically embodying the Black Metal persona (minus the makeup or facepaint stuff).  When the 90’s and the grunge scene hit, I boycotted the flannel wave by wearing combat boots, black shorts, and brightly colored, horizontally striped shirts.  Someone told me that bright horizontal stripes made me look fat and that they were a fashion disaster for someone my size.  So I went out and bought six of them.  To this day, dress codes and pop fashion infuriate me.

6.  I’m notorious for burning bridges.  It takes a lot to piss me off, but once I’m pissed there’s pretty much no turning back.  I’ve always felt that if someone screws you over once or twice, they’ll do it again over and over.  So when I’ve broken ties with jobs or friends, it’s been for good.  Usually by the time I’m done showing my complete ass over the whole thing, they’re pretty much guaranteed to not want me around anymore anyway.  There are several job resignations that I’ve executed that will be remembered for years to come my several people.  When it comes to burning bridges, I am a master artisan of sorts.  It’s a shortcoming that I openly embrace and take pride in.

7.  I used to do leatherwork.  Freelance leatherwork was going to be my ticket away from the grind of working for someone else.  It was going really well too.  Then I got sick and lost the ability to do anything worthwhile with my hands.  Packing away my leather tools and supplies was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.

8.  I once had a pet armadillo.  When I was 9 years old, the old fellow next door killed an armadillo (because he ate anything he could shoot,  but that’s a whole other blog in itself) and then found it had a youngster nearby.  So he gave me the baby to raise.  I fed it meal worms and rocked it to sleep every night.  Then one day, pest control guys sprayed pesticides in our apartment while we were gone and it got poisoned.  It died shortly after I rocked it to sleep one night.  I cried my eyes out.

9.  I’ve always wanted to design a sexual enhancement structure called The Pleasure Dome.  It would be like those Pods that people get delivered to store stuff in, but this would get installed into people’s garages, spare rooms, or gazebos.  It would basically be a circular, enclosed structure with a domed ceiling built into it.  It would be padded and cushioned throughout with plush, washable cushion covers.  various handholds and foot stirrups would be mounted along the walls and ceiling for optimal sexual positioning and stability during lovemaking.  It would have it’s own vent setup that could be hooked into a home’s central heating and cooling system and would have a bonus exhaust vent to keep the air inside nice and fresh.  It would also come complete with a wide array of mood lighting controls, a hub for drinks and refreshments, and a MP3 player ready sound system.  Most importantly, it would be soundproofed.

10.  I’m a Sagittarius.  Unlike what most horoscope books will tell you, I’ve never had much luck at being the Don Juan of the Zodiac.  I tried like hell though when I was younger.  I’ve always felt like a fire sign though.  For the most part, I strongly identify with the common checklist for Sagittarians.  I’m not as extroverted as is usually expected.  Over the last few years I’ve become quite a hermit actually.

Well, I guess that’s it.  There’s not much about me that I haven’t already written about.  It seems the older I get, the less material I have left to tap into without digging into memoirs from the past.  Thanks for stopping by and checking this out.  Special thanks go to Mango for getting me to write something. Ha ha ha!