Mark Twain Quotes
I was looking for a specific quotation and I thought it might have been his. I didn’t find it, but I did find these gems.
“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”
— Mark Twain
“Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.”
— Mark Twain
“Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”
— Mark Twain
“Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.”
— Mark Twain
“God created war so that Americans would learn geography.”
— Mark Twain
“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.”
— Mark Twain
“You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?”
— Mark Twain
“Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.”
— Mark Twain
“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.”
— Mark Twain (The Innocents Abroad/Roughing It)
“A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.”
— Mark Twain
“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure. ”
— Mark Twain
“Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.”
— Mark Twain
“I don’t give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.”
— Mark Twain
“We are all stupid, just on different subjects”
— Mark Twain
“There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man’s notion that he less savage than the other savages.”
— Mark Twain
“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”
— Mark Twain
“We need not worry so much about what man descends from; it’s what he descends to that shames the human race.”
— Mark Twain
“Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know beacause I’ve done it thousands of times.”
— Mark Twain
“Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its use.”
— Mark Twain
Wonderful…some I’d heard before, some not.
“Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.” 😉
I adore Mark Twain! I love his books and quotes. Here are a couple of Twain quotes I like:
“Of all the creatures, man is the most detestable. Of the entire brood, he’s the one that possesses malice. He is the only creature that inflicts pain for sport, knowing it to be pain. The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to the other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.” – Mark Twain
“I am not interested to know whether vivisection produces results that are profitable to the human race or doesn’t….The pain which it inflicts upon unconsenting animals is the basis of my enmity toward it, and it is to me sufficient justification of the enmity without looking further.”— Mark Twain
😉
“We are all stupid, just on different subjects”
— Mark Twain
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No argument. I have mastered stupidity across a wider array of subjects than the average bear… But maybe I could consider that an accomplishment?
Yeah, I know… 🙁