FriendBurst Blog

I was once again toiling for my sister…that’s my brother in law’s wife…The Doktor…helping prune her “Garden” into shape for the coming summer. And once again I didn’t know an African Buttercup Daisy Bottom from an Australian Shrinking Violet Shade Clown…what a surprise…when I again asked her…”Why don’t you just plant and grow weeds? They seem to do just fine without any help and they’re all green…why not?”. To this she replied…and will I ever learn not to ask questions…she replied…

Her…”Do you know what a weed is?”

Me…”Yeah…all that crap around your African Buttercup Daisy Bottoms.”

Her…”No…that particular plant has a name and it’s not weed…nor crap!”

(Never call a plant…”Crap”…to a plant lover.)

Me…”Then why in the hell am I pulling them out if they’re not weeds?!”

Her…”Do you know what the definition of a weed is?”

Me…”…(fuck)…No…what?”

Her…”A weed is defined as a plant that’s growing where it’s not supposed to grow.”

Me…”Well…this is Nature’s Earth…therefor…if a plant is growing in Nature then it’s supposed to…so…no plant can be a weed.”

Her…”No…that’s ~Wild Nature~…what I have here is ~Controlled Nature~…I decide what plants should grow here and where…so therefor…there are weeds.”

Me…”Oh…*ponders*…I think I understand…so…Liberals are weeds growing in the Flowerbed of Freedom…but in…say…Russia…or…China…they wouldn’t be weeds?”

Her…(Massive Lib)…”NO! You don’t want to start down this path Tu!”

Me…”So…you are kind of saying that Freedom…like Nature…can be ~Wild~…or…Freedom can be ~Controlled~?”

Her…”TU! A BETTER ANaLoGY would BE…one could have the most beautiful rare rosebush in the whole world…but…if it was growing in the middle of a corn field…it would be a weed!”

Me…”…*ponders*…So…you are saying I’m a weed?”

Her…”YEAH TU…you’re a weed alright!”