I got into the van tonight after it was all over and was overcome with what felt like a post-coital bliss. You know what I’m talking about. That full-body “ahhhhh” feeling where everything seems wonderful and you’re ecstatic in your exhaustion. Performing satisfactorily at this audition tonight, one I’d been agonizing over as it was […]
SIDESHOW BARKER: STEP RIGHT UP, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Prepare to be astounded when you witness an amazing achievement of the human senses! The Sideshow is proud to bring you kind, generous and curious people the story of an infant boy raised in the animal kingdom, his incredible adaptation to the skills his cetaceous adoptive family […]
Okay, here it is. The full video of my soon-to-be-former school’s production of Moliere’s THE MISER, which I was honored and happy to be a part of. Actually, it wasn’t the SCHOOL’s production, because in their infinite wisdom, they decided to discontinue the Theatre Department in the face of a budget crunch. Instead, this was […]
Okay folks, I need your help. By midnight tonight, I need to submit my bio to the assistant director of the show that I am in. This is what is going to go into the program next to my name and picture. What should it say?
I’ve decided not to use my actual biography. Instead, I’d rather set the mood for our comedy with a mostly inaccurate tale of who I am. Below you will find the four bio’s I have composed for this purpose. I will submit whichever one you think is the funniest. So vote A, B, C or D. Note also that each of the four contains one little bit of accurate information. Can you spot that too?
I got this e-mail from the director of the new play that I’m in:
I’m thinking Frosine would wear high-heeled shoes and would be very comfortable in them. In order for that to work, you may have to wear high-heeled shoes for all or most rehearsals. Is that do-able if we get high-heeled shoes that fit you? What’s your shoe size?
“Will I get to have big boobs?” I asked the director. There was a long pause. “What?” He wasn’t sure what to say. “Y’know… Bazungas! Hooters!” “Okay, yeah, Joko, I think we can manage to get you some very large breast forms.” “Allrighty then. I’ll take it. You’ve got your Frosine.” This was the phone […]
